Tales From the Waiting Room (and other stories)

It All Began with a Rodent

 

Today is our 32nd Anniversary.

As relationships go, ours was non-eventful at the beginning. Mainly because, at the age of 14, I found the male of the species repulsive. Brett, being several years older than I, remembers to this day what I was wearing. I only remember giggling about his afro after he'd gone back to working on his car in one my best friend's driveway. It may surprise many of you to know this, but Brett enjoys working on cars. In those days, it was out of sheer necessity. The reason our paths crossed at all is because (follow the maze), my friend had a much older brother who was married. His wife had a younger brother, who was Brett's best friend. My friend's dad never minded when any of his children's friends or acquaintances showed up and on many occasions helped them with their junkers vehicles. 

I also raised hamsters at that time, and sold them to neighborhood children, unless they got loose and lived in our walls (the hamsters, not the neighbor children). This happened more than one might think. I often wonder if, when people think they live in haunted houses they really just live with wall hamsters. Because they're nocturnal. 

Fast forward a couple of years. My friend's older brother's wife's younger brother was having a party. We stopped by to pay our birthday respects. I had not given Brett another thought in those intervening years, as I had a boyfriend (I did grow out of my male repulsion syndrome). I'd heard through the grapevine that he was engaged but that was about it. 

At the party was a girl we'll call Ginger, because that's her name. This was the girl Brett was engaged to. Ginger was an extremely friendly young lady, and the guys were delighted to have her sit on their laps and show her affection. I had wondered if perhaps they had broken off their nuptial plans, but was informed this was not the case, simply that Brett was away at college. I took his friend off to the side (away from the music, which wasn't really possible, but at least when you went on the front porch and closed the door it wasn't deafening). I asked him how he was going to tell Brett about his generous fiancee. 

Turns out he wasn't. I thought that a bit cruel, as they planned to marry in about six months and I may have been old-fashioned even at 16, but thought that it might be a piece of information he would find handy before ordering the cake and putting down payment on the tux rental.

As for my hamsters, I still had quite a business. I would usually keep any baby that had unusual markings or color, so I could improve on the brand. I kept one female who was quite pretty, but as she matured I found she had a nasty temperament. The one hamster that I could never train or tame. I named her Ginger. It was perhaps my way of finding a bit of equity for a guy I'd only met once but felt sorry for. 

Providentially, a few months later I was invited to a pool party at my friend's older brother's wife's younger brother's gang. School had just gotten out for the summer and I only had one year of high school left. I looked forward to swimming again, one of my favorite things. In a Land of 10,000 Lakes I'd seen my share of water. My parents took us fishing and swimming since before I can remember (I think). 

Brett was at the pool party, home from college. After about an hour, he worked up the courage to ask me if I was doing anything Friday night. I said I supposed that I was doing SOMETHING, since I didn't often do nothing, even if it was staying home and watching Hee Haw with my dad. Daunted, he swam away. Before he left he took a more direct approach and asked me out on a date. I said that I'd heard he was engaged. He said "Oh, we're just sort of engaged." I said "Engaged is a verb. You either are or you aren't. I don't go out with people who are otherwise committed, even if -sort of-." 

He said "Can I call you tomorrow?" I said he could. Directly from the pool party he went to his fiancee's house and broke it off officially. Then he called to ask me out. I said I had a boyfriend (which was true). He said he didn't mind. 

I asked him to call me the next day. That afternoon, I broke up with my boyfriend. I don't remember if it was semi-mutual or not. I do know that I hurt his feelings because he knew why I was breaking up with him. If I never said I was sorry, Michael, I'll say it now. To this day he's a great guy even though he's a liberal and probably a registered democrat. Based on the fact that I'm slightly to the right of Ronald Reagan, politically-speaking, it wouldn't have ended well anyway. 

So Brett and I went out. He had unfortunately sold his car for a motorcycle the day before, because the gas prices were getting higher (remember when we stood in fuel lines for hours because there was a democrat in the White House?) 

I couldn't believe that my dorky parents wouldn't let me go out with this guy JUST BECAUSE he drove a motorcycle! I was almost 17, for heaven's sake! My mother informed me that I also wasn't allowed to go out with him because he was a "college boy" and I was still in high school. Oh, I had her on that one, he'd dropped out of college. Take that, mom! Oddly, she wasn't persuaded with that argument either. I then mentioned he was a pastor's son and a look of alarm crossed her face the likes of which I'd never seen before. I thought that would be a selling point. 

It took forEVER to talk my parents into dating him (3 days). They met him, my dad didn't smile, plus he  towered over him (my family is Dutch and few of them are under 7 feet tall), and they agreed to let me date him. But not on a motorcycle. So we went out in my parents' Omega.

For my 17th birthday the next week, Brett bought me a car so we could date and not have to take my parents' car, which was often in use. My parents thought this was too extravagant of a gift and wouldn't allow me to accept it. So he gave me a diamond necklace instead. 

At that point my parents just kind of gave up and prayed for the best. We dated throughout my senior year, which is good otherwise I'd still be in high school trying to pass Algebra. Brett would spend hours every night explaining what he thought were simple concepts, over and over. The same concepts. I'd finally "get it" and like Audrey Hepburn in My Fair Lady, I would surprise myself and easily complete the rest of my homework. Then I'd wake up the next morning and sleep had erased the Algebra portion of my brain. It must have been true love because he would patiently teach me all over again that evening.

Shortly after my graduation, we informed my parents that we'd like to get married. That October. They reminded us of how tolerant they had been and asked us to please wait until next year.  

So we checked the church's calendar, turns out they were open for a January 26 wedding (we figured we'd give people time to recover from holiday travel).

 

My parents said "We meant a YEAR, not just the calendar year." But I had them on a technicality. 

It's gone well so far. We've changed a lot, added a few children and even more livestock. 

 

Of course, it was very cold that day: 

Even for Minnesota.

 

Have a great weekend, everyone! 

Residential Flatwork

Yeah I know. The Golden Globe Awards just gained national, if not international attention and acclaim. But Hollywood is fickle, and fame is fleeting. What matters most in this sad old world of ours  is that our driveway has won its first award. This is actually the first driveway we've ever had that has won an award. To be completely honest, I didn't realize this was a possibility. 

I asked our driveway what it thought about the honor. It was too verklempt to speak for quite some time, but I finally got him to say a few words, which he wanted to convey to you here, since the permanence of his residency ironically makes road travel impossible.

"I'd like to first of all thank The Concrete Promotional Group, a heretofore relatively unknown organization, without whom this honor would not have been possible. Second, the Easleys themselves, who have provided me with a strong foundation since my youth. They poured their heart and money into my very existence, and made sure I was never spoiled by my fame, yet used daily for the purpose for which I was made. The solid groundwork upon which I was laid is a testimony to their commitment--nay, their sincere dedication--that driveways everywhere should be treated with respect, whether they be a few feet long or half a mile, such as I am. But I am not here to brag, because I cannot take credit (and neither would the company that formed me) because all that I am brings me to the events of today, and has further cemented my belief that justice truly does exist in this world, and if you just lay there every day and let people walk all over you, you too may be the recipient of this award. But I wouldn't seal my pores."

He said it all, really. I remain humbled and we will try not allow this to go to our heads. I'm not saying it will be easy. The award sets next to my high school arm-wrestling championship trophy and the children's Grand Prix awards. The Golden Spoon awards (spray painted wooden spoons) stand triumphantly behind them, earned by the children for creating delicious desserts. 

Let's get back to what was really important about today though. The snow started to melt and was at that perfect temperature for making snow folk. Also, it was Martin Luther King Jr. day, and homeschoolers know that there's never really such a thing as a day off. So the snow-folk were allowed after morning chores were done. 

Abigail and Mercy were annoyed at Isaiah's decision to put arms on the snowperson.

Susannah soon tired of rolling snow, and wanted to know if this looked like a realistic enough head to put on a snow-woman. Sure Susannah, it looks totally normal. Especially on Martin Luther King Jr. Day. At least the snowwoman should have been dyed black. We could have named her Rosa. 

Josh wasn't content with a mere snowman. So here is his snow throne. The children took turns being a royal something-or-other.

Finally Josh got a chance to relax on his throne.

Judson finished his featureless snowperson.

Nate used a little more artwork in his creation.

After a brief date with hot chocolate....

It was then time for school. Who better to learn about today, than the holiday bearing the name of who was being celebrated?

 ]

It took a couple hours, but they all finished their sheets, and a Q&A afterward. Good thing they (mostly) paid attention to their lessons! They were then released to play for the rest of their....holiday.

Apparently there may be another "snow day" tomorrow, as freezing ice is predicted for tonight. It matters not that much to us, but it somehow all seems more festive when the world decrees that it is too dangerous to venture out. 

Good thing I went to the grocery store today. 

 

Crabby Legs

Sure, we had a great Christmas and New Year's and I may post more about that later.

But then I got really sick the other day. Then a few other members of the family got really sick. Two  nights ago I was so sick, I ate rotten crab legs. 

But I'm getting ahead of myself. 

Sunday evening, despite not feeling the greatest, we went out on a planned activity with the children anyway. When we got home I was so hungry I couldn't think of anything except the crab legs that I'd bought 3 days ago, with the express intent on eating them on New Year's Eve while watching "It's a Wonderful Life." (those two things go together, don't they?)

Then we got invited out on New Year's Eve--our whole family--which almost never happens (see: number of children) and we decided to go to the place where there were lots of homemade treats (including sushi!) and bored board games. Brett discovered Boggle for the first time. It's now on its way here from Amazon.com. 

Thankfully there was a Pictionary game going on as well, which is one of few games I have the patience to handle for longer than 5 minutes. I have come to terms with this about myself--this.. not liking to play most board games. I have decided that I'm still a good-enough mom, even though I don't play Crazy 8's or Go Fish card games with my children. Instead, I give them a daily vitamin and figure that when they're old and healthy, they can decide which games they want to play, and mock me after I'm dead about what a lousy mother I was. "She could have just fed us healthy, homegrown vegetables and meat instead of the vitamin, and still played games. It wasn't an either/or situation there." 

But our gardens never make it past the July drought anyway, and the children sob when we try to butcher our meat goats. "I love her! She's always so nice when I go out to the barn!" Instead, we purchase half a beef twice a year and also shoot deer (two this year! Go Josh and Brett!). My explanation that the cow also at one time had a face and parents, doesn't seem to hold water with the children. So the "hay-burners" live their lives out in pleasure in our fine pastures. 

So, last night when we got back from our activity with the kiddos, I was at that time quite feverish and had no brain activity left. Really, I think if I'd been hooked up to an EEG, it would have flat-lined. See, for a couple of days we'd been trying to figure out what the heck that awful smell was, coming from the refrigerator. Sometimes Brett would open the fridge, dig around a bit, and say something like "It seems like a rotten meat sort of smell" and then we'd discuss what meat was in the fridge. Of course it wasn't the children's bologna, that takes at least a year to rot thanks to current processing methods (Oh, hence the vitamins). Then--eureka!--I found an old bag of chives. Tossed those, sealed up the trash bag, and tossed it in the garbage cart to be taken out later this week. Confidently I strode over to the fridge and opened it up again. 

No change. 

It didn't occur to me that it could be the crab legs, because I'd *just bought them* 3 days ago. I went to my computer, too weary to carry on, and slumped over while reading boring political sites. Then Brett--not feeling too well himself--declared that he found the offending food, and it was the crab legs. 

"BOTH bags?" I said. Both? Really?  Maybe just one. Because now that he said "crab legs" they immediately sounded like something I must have very soon. 

He said that one bag was bad so he threw it out but the other seemed...okay.  So despite not feeling the greatest himself, he cooked up the crab legs, melted some butter, and served it to me. Immediately I knew they, too, were rotten. By this time Brett was so stuffed up he couldn't smell anything so "it seemed fine to him."  Good enough. In retrospect, it was a huge mistake, because on top of the flu I now had food poisoning. Not bad really but enough to make me curious about my sanity. 

So on a good note, we'll leave you with a few photos of our wonderful holiday season, which really was wonderful, and all I'd hoped it would be. 

But then, my standards are low.

And, what would a holiday scenario be without baby livestock? I ask you.

Have a beautiful New Year, all! 

 

Just Like That

It's so quiet here now. We miss all of the big kids being here, and the grandchildren. What a crazy, too-short time we had with everyone! We were also blessed to have one of our DIL's parents here for a little while too. It was extra-special to see Taylor, who just returned from Afghanistan in October.  I managed to get some photos of the beautiful grandchildren (oh..and their parents).

Thanksgiving was delicious. I was banned from the kitchen. I tell myself it's because they wanted to give me a break, not because they don't like my cooking. And truthfully, I cannot cook like my children can. They watch the cooking shows and do strange things with fires, oddly-shaped tools, and spices. They pair seemingly unrelated foods together and make them taste good.

 

My sole contribution was my 7-layer salads made the day before, which were nearly forgotten in the last-minute rush to get everything on the wheelie cart and out to the table. The children had their own wing of the house. That's sparkling cider on their table, mom :)  Although in retrospect....nah.

The babies sat out with us.

Isaiah's birthday was two days after Thanksgiving this year. 

He was delighted with his toys.

A few days before his birthday, Isaiah went to one of his tri-annual appointments with his eye surgeon. For most of his life, we've dealt with his congenital cataracts, laser surgeries, and all-day patching. We've dutifully gone to the appointments and listened to what the next step would be, and prepared ourselves for it.  

This time, the doctor said that his eyes were fine. No more surgery, ever. No more patching, ever. No more bifocals, except maybe in his 60's. 

They're fine.

Just like that.

The house is quiet, the grandchildren are gone.

Isaiah's eyes are fine.

Just like that. 

I've Been Specially Selected!

By the 2010 Missouri Tree Survey!

With the added promise of 4 free gift vouchers AND a bonus gift! The outside of the envelope is clearly marked: PARTICIPATION GIFTS ENCLOSED: DO NOT BEND

With trembling hands, I tore into the envelope, careful not to damage the vouchers. 

I read: "We'd like to ask you about trees. Whether you've climbed them as a child, cultivate them now, or if you've lost interest, we'd like to know!"

Does anyone really lose interest in trees? I can understand not having trees take up a good deal of one's thought process (unless it's on fire) but I'm wondering, are there people, who if asked if trees should exist would say "Eh, I could take 'em or leave 'em." 

The survey goes on to warn: "You may be wondering why what you think about trees is important. The answer is that trees are important and our job a the Arbor Day Foundation is to make sure people in Missouri - and across the country - know that. But we can't try to change the way people think about trees until we know what they think about them now.

I was further cautioned that our very existence depends upon trees. (I thought it was bees? I saw that movie). 

"Trees are, in short, priceless. To us, to the Earth, to our future." 

Turns out they're not priceless to the Arbor Day Foundation, because with a small donation of at least $10 I will be able to redeem my free vouchers for free trees, a flowering shrub, an entry into a drawing for a free year's worth of coffee (this is the one that caught my attention) AND two free bonus gifts - a book about trees and a rain forest calendar. 

Didn't we used to call them "jungles"? I want a jungle calendar. 

I don't think I'll return the form. The questions are just too hard. For example, I can only pick one out of these possible answers to the question "Which one of the following would you say is the single most important function of trees?"

1. Providing shade

2. Providing oxygen

3. Being a source of beauty

4. Absorbing carbon dioxide

5. Filtering water

6. Saving energy by cooling our homes.

7. Providing habitats for birds and animals.

I also can't answer these questions:

"Can you identify the trees near your home?" As I've mentioned before, I have not gotten around to naming them all yet. 

Then the good news at the end says "THANK YOU! Now....(drum roll) it's time to redeem all your FREE vouchers! I'm enclosing all of my FREE GIFT vouchers with my donation of (pick one) $10, $15, $20 and a box for "more." 

There is also a box to check that says "I do not want to support the Arbor Day Foundation at this time, but let me know if I've won the coffee." 

I'm afraid that if I check that box, lightning will strike. Ha! I joke. As if that could happen. 

One baby, Two parents, and Five Guys

I suppose it's no real surprise that we have grandchildren arriving close together, but it seems like a mere year and a half ago we had none. In fact, it was, and now there are five. With our oldest son acquiring a stepson when he married, and then twin boys (in February of this year), and our second son and his wife having two little girls 17 months apart, we were plunged quickly into grandparenting.  Joseph, our 9 year old step-grand, blended seamlessly into our family, since we have five boys not far from his age (some younger, some older). 

The advent of Tim and Jeni's daughter Naomi a few months later brought the wonder of a baby girl to us. Even with our six beautiful daughters, none had arrived as newborns, so it was fascinating to hold a tiny, blond girl who was and is every single inch a "girlie girl." 

And now we have a newer granddaughter!  Congratulate us on our most recent grandbaby, Sophia Grace. Tipping the scales at 6 lbs, 11 oz. on April 8, she arrived looking as much like Timothy, as their daughter Naomi has favored her mother. It was interesting to see such different baby faces on sisters. 

Since I had planned to do the Easter and birthday shopping on the Thursday before Easter (son Josh's 14th birthday is the day before Easter this year), but instead hopped a plane Wednesday morning, I decided to do my shopping while in NY. Visitors weren't allowed in the maternity ward before noon, so that gave me a chance to get some much-needed running around done. Fed Ex made sure the goodies arrived at our Missouri home the next day. I find myself wondering anew how mankind ever survived without the internet and overnight delivery, respectively the 8th and 9th wonders of the world. 

Tim called on my cell phone (10th!) and I offered to bring him lunch since I would be arriving at noonish. I had tried to park in a strip mall lot that had a lot of fast-food choices, but it was quite busy and I had not had the foresight to bring one of my disabled children on the trip with me (and their requisite handicapped parking placard). I drove around but only found this space open.

I of course have usually been able to utilize the HOV (high occupancy vehicle) lanes, but was driving solo that day. Still, I wondered at the gender discrimination and was curious as to how they enforced this strange law. What if they were transvestites? Who checks? 

As I chatted with Tim, I mentioned it and he said it was a hamburger joint. Indeed, it was. And in fact, a very good hamburger joint at that, and I brought lunch for all of us.

After the hospital released Jeni on her own recognizance this morning, I helped them settle in at home. By "help" I mean, mainly took pictures.  They'll thank me later. 

Jeni's parents arrived with Naomi, whom they had been taking care of for the last couple of days, and Kourtney, Jeni's sister. More photo ops!

For the birth announcement, Jeni wanted a sweet photo of Naomi gently kissing Sophie's precious head. I had plans of using a soft-focus lens filter, giving the photo an ethereal feel. In my mind I knew exactly how I would like them to pose. 

The Stones said it first and perhaps best:  "You can't always get what you want." 


"But if you try sometimes, you just might find, that you get what you need"


Jeni's going to give it another try tomorrow and see if she can get Naomi to actually come in contact with Sophie. 

And I'm up in the air now, literally.  Sad to leave the sweethearts, but now it's back home to my own darlings, who are no doubt anxious to see what I brought them  so excited to see me and give me a big hug.

A very Blessed Easter to all of our loved ones, and to the rest of you as well :)